It's Not Lazyness....I Swear....Well Maybe a Little

Well, I can't deny the fact that in the last month, I've managed to get out about three posts. It's not that there aren't articles or Top Ten's to post, we've just been really busy over at the PITAOE towers. I, for one, will be relocating to China at the end of the month, so It's been a bit hectic for me. Needles to say, I've been neglecting my duties over a bit in the wake of all the planning I've been doing...apologies. Now that things are a little less crazy things should be getting back to normal. That is all.

Top Ten Action Scenes of All Time #3: Spiderman 2 (The Clock Tower-Train Fight)

# 3 The Clock Tower – Train Fight

It is actually hard for me to put into words how much I love this scene. It is, to make it very clear, my favorite scene in movie history. That sounds a bit strong…but I think that's true. It's not just that no scene has ever captured comic book action as well…but this sequence is everything I would ever want from a superhero movie. For me, the scene is nirvana, what I'd waited my whole life to see on screen and it even still surpasses all my hopes.



There is nothing about the scene I don't love. Molina's little taunt of "Let's talk" followed by Spider-Man's yell of anger. I love the move where Spider-Man uses his web to slingshot one of the clocks' hour-hands back at Doc Ock. And then when they're on the train I love how the fight takes place all over the train – even on the side and in the train itself. The only sad thing is, I seriously doubt this scene will ever be topped for me. It's as good as it gets.



Because this whole article has been a bit hyperbolic I'll just say it…this fight actually inspires awe from me. Awe. It is a slice of fried gold on a bagel made of joy.



A little taste of happiness:

Top Ten Action Scenes of All Time #4: Blade (Blood Rave)

#4 Blade - Blood Rave

Until very recently, I thought Henry and Sam were very smart. Then we voted on this list and it turned out that I was the only one that voted this fight as #1. There's a word for that: dumb; in that it's dumb to vote on the greatest fight scene and then wind up voting for 'NOT the greatest fight scene in movies.' Which is what all those other scenes are.

'Blade' is an awesome movie. It came out shortly before 'The Matrix' and, by most pure action movie measures, blows 'The Matrix' out of the water. Sure, 'Matrix' is probably a better made movie and certainly was way more influential, but when you look at the fights (with one notable exception addressed on this list) they're all sort of bloodless and non-tactile. Sure, the look is cool and wire-fu felt very fresh at the time, but even on my first watching of 'Matrix' I never really got the sense that anyone was hitting one another. The key examples are usually the dojo fight and the showdown in the subway station. Those are visually well-done fights, but they do not give the illusion of real combat; the fact that no one is hitting one another is quite obvious.

With 'Blade' (the titular anti-hero played by Wesley Snipes), on the other hand, there's a real chance some of those stuntmen are now dead. The actual combat look that real. And sure, the cgi can be a bit cheesy, but when a guy gets his head slammed in to a ceiling, it looks bone-breaking. Having your kickass hero level a room full of people is a great way to start an action movie and 'Blade' does it best. It might as well be scientific fact. Having an intro this impressive let's you know that Blade himself is so tough that he only has one weakness........

Federal prosecutors with charges of tax evasion.

Top Ten Action Scenes of All Time #5: Aliens (The Power Loader Fight)

#5 Power Loader Fight

I'm not nearly as good as Henry at ranking my movie preferences. For one thing, I think the order can change with my mood. The only exception is that Aliens is probably my favorite movie.

.........so I'm biased.

But the movie is so good at evoking emotions and making you feel for the genuinely three-dimensional characters, that's a huge amount of why the fight works. Yes, the fight is a technical achievement and a testament to (the director) James Cameron's and (the cinematographer) Adrian Biddle's skill; they took what ultimately was mashing two life-size action figures together, the way little boys make their action figures fight, and made it kinetic, realistic and dangerous. Both the Queen and the power loader were puppets, but I defy you to find a serious flaw in the special effects even thought the film is more than two decades

old (!) and, as a result, there's nothing to take you out of the moment. The hits look bone-crushing, the grappling seems to have weight behind it and the Queen's tail looks like it might impale Ripley at any moment.

As a result, a lot is owed to Sigourney Weaver. A lesser actress would have made this look hokey or fake because her knowledge of the scene's unreality would be reflected in her performance. Instead, we believe that this is a woman who is angry and afraid for the girl that now, in Ripley's mind, clearly serves as her proxy child. Incidentally, it's a success of the acting that we don't want to kill that same child ourselves; rare among really young actors and actresses.

This brings me to my ultimate point: many of the best moments in movie history are so good because of what preceded them in their respective films. In this case, after all Ripley and co. have been through, they have finally killed the monsters and a few of them have escaped with their lives, most importantly the young girl Newt that, as I mentioned, Ripley has effectively adopted (a very cool aspect of this movie). The people watching care about these well-developed, likable characters. When it turns out that the most dangerous alien of all has survived, followed them and is now trying to kill a defenseless Newt, Ripley has had enough. The audience feels for her; we're pissed, too and don't want to be denied our happy ending. What follows is one of the best build-ups in movies as Ripley suits up off-camera in the one weapon we know she can use well, the power loader, and proceeds to absolutely fuck up the Queen's day, but not before growling those immortal words that every sane audience should cheer:

"Get away from her, you BITCH!"

Conversat-a-Review: Wall*E

We're trying out a new format this week. In lieu of a formal review we'll be posting a back and forth we had shortly after seeing the film. Hit the link our thoughts.

Henry: Hey Sam

Sam: fuck you

Henry: So we just saw Wall*E

Sam: we sure did

Henry: Fine. Here's a cool soccer goal

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KJhx2y2mHls&eurl=http://andrewsullivan.theatlantic.com/

Sam: Haha you're right that was really cool, a bit sneaky

Henry: So anyway - Wall-E. Where would you rank it among the Pixar catalogue?
So we're talking Toy Story 1 and 2, Bug's Life, Monster's Inc, Nemo, Les Incroyables, Cars, and the Rat

Sam: Probably third, Nemo, Incredibles then Wall*E, then the rat

Henry: Fair. For me it doesn't get any better than The Incredibles...then maybe the first Toy Story, then Wall*E and Nemo tied for third

Sam: I Don't think Wall E was as good as Nemo, I mean I get it, he's a robot, but the not talking thing made the whole movie so much more simple than Nemo, for me it was a cute robot and cool animation

Henry: see I absolutely disagree, like strongly disagree. This was a far, FAR more sophisticated and interesting movie than Nemo.

Sam: I don’t know about that, I mean Nemo had more mature themes; loss, death, maturation of a child, Wall E has, boy meets girl, boy loses girl,boy chases girl, boy gets girl.

Henry: Well thematically...you're right to give Nemo its props. I forgot the really grim opening and all that. But I guess I was more referring to the manner in which the stories are told. Nemo, in the end, is a pretty basic narrative told in a paint-by-numbers way. It works because it is just very well done. Wall*E is a much harder story to tell for the very reason you knock it - the lack of dialogue

Sam: I suppose. That’s not to say that it's not great (Wall*E), Nemo just happened to be amazing

Henry: fair. Let’s get back to the movie at hand. So the opening sequence, before E.V.E. arrives, is not something you see very often in a kid’s movie. It has some humor but is also quite stark in some ways and was loaded with wide shots of what the earth has become. When I was watching it, even though I knew we still had 100+ minutes to go or whatever, like I was watching some kind of experimental short film or something

Sam: It was definitely different from the standard Disney opening; usually they set up a happy scene and then have something terrible happen which motivates the protagonist to go on a journey of sorts. I suppose the beginning to Wall E is just good old character development.

Henry: Yup. I was really impressed with the...balls this movie had to open like that. I thought his early interaction with E.V.E. was some of the best stuff in the movie. I thought him trying to impress her in his little home was the most charming scene in the movie.

Sam: Very charming indeed, although I think most of it is lost on the core audience. Lets be fair, those scenes were extremely well done, but they were also the scenes where the kids in the movie looked the most bored.

Henry: Well that's the one thing I said to you when we walked out. I think that the movie was kind of brilliant. And I absolutely see why basically every critic in America and London thinks it’s the best movie of the year so far. But I think it fails on one level: It really isn't that great a kid’s movie. I mean Wall*E is an incredibly cute character. and his relationship with E.V.E. is one of the best Disney romances (hm...maybe the best?) but as a kids movie it had too much dead space.

Sam: That’s true, but towards the end you could tell that someone in the studio had the same thought: cue thirty minutes of action. The whole movie had a bit of an odd composition, it was all plot development, then all mindless action, and then a little more plot at the end, I would have liked to see it blend more.

Henry: yup, but the story kind of called for that progression. Not disagreeing that it was a bit unevenly paced but the story also demanded that the first 40 minutes be more thoughtful than action packed or silly. And to be clear, I actually thought the second half was really fun. I thought the human characters were entertaining, the action bits were relatively original...the multiple acts of heroism E.V.E. and Wall*E both performed were better than what you see in some superhero movies....

You're right when you say that the movie is kind of two movies smushed together. Both are good...and while the first half really impressed me...I think I almost admired it more than I liked it. I really LIKED the second half.

Sam: They were both great, and honestly, the kids who see it won't care, they'll be bored by the first half but completely forget it after watching the last half of the movie.
It was also nice to see some things thrown in there for the adults. I have to commend Pixar for making all the people from the future extremely fat. I mean it's not like a 5 year old gets that people living in space having machines do everything for them would atrophy into gross fatties...excuse my terminology

Henry: well I mean...it’s not like this movie was as over-the-top with the message as something like Happy Feet...but its message was pretty clear. But that's fine...because I agreed with the message...you know, that people are lazy and rely on technology too much.

On a side note, there's not much to say about the voice acting (though they did nail the Wall*E voice) other than it was nice to hear Sigourney Weaver's voice as the Captain's computer. The music was relatively forgettable actually. But that's never been Pixar's strength (though I liked The Incredibles wacky score). And of course the animation was good but do you even notice great animation nowadays? I feel like all these movies look so good that I only notice when they look like shit like Madagascar or something

Sam: Good god...happy feet....sure fire way to get your kid nice and depressed, might as well tell him that grandma didn't go on vacation and fluffy is buried in the back yard. But back to the topic at hand, I'd say you're right. Do I really see the difference between Wall E and the Incredibles graphically, nope. I’m sure it's there, but it just doesn't have any bearing anymore, that is as long as it looks okay, but the difference between amazing and very good is too hard to see. As for the music, it was a non factor, especially since so much of the early parts of the film were without any. That’s where Disney could have helped out, but they're a bunch of jerks, so who knows, maybe they're saving all the good music for Disney solo projects

Henry: Haha. Well I have really have one more thought on the movie and this is one reason I really liked / respect the hell out of the movie. I really like it when a movie is able to create something iconic. For instance...I don't like the movie E.T.. Just don't like it that much. But I am really amazed at how Spielberg was able to take this....ugly creature and make this incredibly iconic movie around it. The bike/moon shot, the "phone home" business. I like it when, and excuse me while I get a little high-minded here, but i like it when we get real quality films that can enter our collective conscience. And whether Wall*E is the best kids movie ever or just a really good one is not important. I just think that the character, and some of the scenes of this movie, are right up there with the best kid's stuff ever done. And I just gotta tip my cap to Pixar for accomplishing that

Sam: Definitely a great movie, I'm probably going to see it again over the next couple of days, so we'll see if everything holds up okay. As I see it right now, it had an interesting plot, great animation, and lot's of fun scenes, as well as some tear jerkers...just about everything a good Disney movie used to have (Bambi, Pinocchio etc)

Henry: Yup. Definitely deserves an A grade. It is certainly the best made movie I've seen so far this year. It's as good as the critics say...everyone should see the movie


Sam: There will be blood....wait..that was last year..yeah it's probably the best.